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For several weeks, I've been avoiding the abundance of Mother's Day shop displays at all costs. For a daughter who year after year loved & participated in this annual tribute to our Mums, it's a strange reaction to have. It feels foreign. It feels wrong. I feel like an orphan while everyone else celebrates this meaningful occasion.
I'm on the cusp of the two month mark. The approach of Mother's Day is making my sadness & loneliness feel even more raw - if that's at all possible. I feel like an outsider looking in on a beloved milestone that was always a highlight on my calendar.
I don't begrudge others who are noting this day with their Mums - not at all! - I just wish that mine was here for a bunch of warm hugs, another day of being spoilt and one more opportunity for me to tell her how much she means to me. I even have a card - one that I purchased a few months ago - that I would have given to her this coming weekend...
This Sunday, May 9 is Mother's Day in Canada, the US and Australia. Be sure to phone or visit your Mums this Mother's Day and tell her how much you love her. I'd do anything to have that chance again.
3 comments:
It'll be three yrs friday since my Grandmother passed. While I'm still able to celebrate the other 'mothers' in my life, the fact that the two days are so close always seems to sneak up on me. I've been thinking a lot about you lately...knowing that this was your 1st one. Its strange, but I would have told my grandmother about this wonderfully, crazy group of classy ladies I know and how much fun we have talking about'soccer'. She would have laughed and said I liked the strangest things, but she would've have liked it because I did. I miss having someone who cares to know all about the randomness of my life.
Hi Jennifer, thanks for your lovely comment about your Grandmother. She sounds like such a wonderful lady who loved you so very much. A very wise friend of mine suggested that I start a new Mother's Day tradition as a way to mark the occasion in a different manner but still honouring my Mum. I haven't figured out what that might be yet but I think she's got a good point. It feels wrong to simply ignore the day since it's never been our way.
I know how you feel. I lost my mother when I was 22 (27 years ago). I still mourn her. I watched my friends as they had their mothers with them as they had their children and raised them. I never got to have an adult relationship with my mother to get to truly spoil her and tell her how much she meant to me.
Try to find peace in gratitude for what you had. I believe they are still with us and watching with loving hearts.
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